Open This!

You’re walking down the hallway in a corporate office. You see the boss rounding the corner. You know he’s going to ask the status of the Quality Audit Reports that were due last Friday. Rather than stand up for an ass chewing, you quickly duck into the open supply closet and ease the door shut.

Smart move! But then you realize the door has locked behind you trapping you inside with butterfly clips, staplers, reams of copy paper, and boxes of toner cartridges. You have to admit to yourself that maybe this wasn’t such a smart move after all.

But wait! Behind the reams of copy paper, you see the leftover drinks from the holiday fiesta! Amongst all the bottled waters is a case of baby Coronita beer bottles, full of liquid happiness.

Things are looking up! Then you realize you don’t have a bottle opener to free the happiness and ease your anxiety. Or do you? Fortunately, you have a formal education and learned how to be resourceful. The classic Swingline stapler to the rescue!

No, you haven’t sniffed too much liquid paper. Popping open the refill lid of the stapler reveals a notch at the head. Flip the stapler over and you have a perfectly good opener. Or at least, good enough.

To use, simply line up the notch over the cap and pry. You find that the stapler takes a few tugs to work the crown of the cap, but the rewards are just a sip away.

The Coronitas are small, but there are many of them. You also learn that as the night wears on the stapler becomes less and less efficient as a tool. But determination and persistence push you forward to keep twisting caps until you clear the shelves.

The building Admin opens the door to the stock room the next morning and finds you slumped in a pile of empties with the stapler still in your grip. She gives you a knowing nod and quietly shuts the door and turns out the light.

This small iron bottle opener is simple and effective. Made from 100% recycled iron by the fine people at Borough Furnace, this little opener is a gem. Its wedge shape fits great and the weight feels strong and comfortable in your hand. I find the opener needs a little heft to quickly pop a cap. This opener weighs in at about 6.5 oz (175g) which creates a nice balance for its size. It routinely pops a cap cleanly on the first try and thus earns a spot in the silverware drawer when I’m home, and the back pocket when I’m out.

Borough Furnace is a casting workshop located in Syracuse, NY. They recycle scrap iron and cast skillets and bottle openers using custom casting tools. They fuel their furnace using old fryer grease to further conserve resources and materials. They do everything by hand in small batches to ensure quality.

Just as they do with their skillets, Borough Furnace has seasoned their opener with organic flax seed oil to seal the iron and protect it from rust. According to the manufacturer, the raw iron just out of the furnace is very vulnerable – it can rust just from the salt and moisture in your skin. Some iron openers are sealed with paint instead, but the look of the flax seed oil is a better fit for this opener. The finished product both looks and works great.

A cheaper Zamak version is also available, made of zinc-aluminum alloy which is about 33% lighter.

Summary

Does it open? Yes, with efficiency and style. This opener is nice and heavy and perfectly sized to do the job. I love it.

Can it do anything else? It’s perfect hand size for breaking down blocks of ice or flinging around the house like a ninja throwing star.

Overall rating:  (5 / 5). This opener is one of my favorites and has earned a permanent home in the kitchen drawer.

References: Borough Furnace